There IS a light!!!

Well aside from being offered another job (with 6 weeks vacation to start) (which I turned down). Anyhow, I told my boss...I need a day off a week. Yeah!!!!! So I will be back to my day off a week :) I am so happy...

Tara

Oh what a day :(

Today was not a good day at work. A dad freaked out on me, trying to make me fearful of him or something. I dunno. The staff complaining about kids, the staff complaining about everything...my boss on my back. I can't handle this today. EVERYone is complaining to me. Is this what it means to be the 'manager' is????oh my God, and where do I QUIT?

Anyhow, not a good day by far.

There are *so* many jobs out there, but I hate switching...but I hate staying somewhere where I am unhappy. There is *so* much pressure for me these days that I can't hardly take it...seriously.

Anyhow, I will be over it later...but until now....ahhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"Hobo"

So here is our Hobo. We call him Hobo, because sadly...he is a Hobo. He is just SUCH a wonderful and loving dog. When we are out there, he is just so happy and stays at our lot the WHOLE time. He was here last summer too. So I mean, he is eating somewhere but still. He sleeps on

our deck at night and I feel horrible calling Bandit in and not letting him in. So guess what? This weekend, he slept in the cabin. And, he slept...like slept really really good. He didn't move the whole night. And his look, was so sad. He was just so happy. He stayed there the whole weekend

agian...and when we left, he chased our car to the end of the resort...and *I* had tears flowing down my cheeks. I decided that by winter I will either bring him to SPCA or take him home. Fabe said "he can stay in the back yard!" (he's a shedder) but yeah, no. So I feed him there and make sure he has water. He comes for walks with us, he swims with Bandit. He is just SUCH a good boy, its so nice having him around. He's quiet, doesn't bark...just is happy to be with people. I love him :( He's an older dog, I can tell. About 8 I would guess. Sleeping outside, must be hard on him now. Not knowing where he is eating all the time must be hard on him...Anyhow. I wanted to post pics so that he 'knows' someone out here loves him :(

Lake pics!

Ducks honking by us!
Kids eating lunch on the deck.

Kennedy...

Mack and his fruit...this boy LOOOOOVES fruit! Cherries!!!!

Cherries!!!!!

Kennedy and Mack enjoying some fruit....yummy!

We don't have bathroom out there yet, that will be a part of the new part of the cabin. We just built the cabin last year, the bigger one and we were going to use the trailer for a bathroom but decided just to built on more. So next year we will do that and we will bring our trailer back. We are thinking about parking the trailer close to Edm in a campground and that way we can work and sleep out at the trailer as it will be close to home. Plus, a place to go without Fabe while he works weekends, as I won't stay out at the cabin alone...

Kennedy using the oouthouse!

We love the lake. It gets better every year, with the more that we do with it. There is ALWAYS some kind of work out there, but its nice work. Even cutting the grass is enjoyable...with all the birds, water and friendly people its just so nice being out there. Its a long drive (2.5 hours) but oh my gosh, sooooooo worth every minute of it. The further you get from Edm. the better you feel.

The lake again!

Mack and his baby (quad!)

Fabe filling up Macks quad with gas...

Mack waiting for Kennedy...

What more can you ask for? Coffee, a big deck over looking a lake....ahhhhh...

The kids enjoying the new patio set, looks so nice on the deck now :)

Bandit finding shade, from the patio box..

So beautiful!

The new patio set...isn't it pretty!

Well my mom headed out to the lake Friday afternoon with the kids and the dog. I went to my clothing club party! It was fun and met some new people and got to know people who I already knew, a little better. Came home about 11:30pm Fabe was still up. We watched TV in bed. Saturday we woke up, and Fabe went to work. We left to the lake later on in the day. We got there later, but it was still light out and everything. It was nice. We didn't do too much that night. We went to bed pretty early. We slept until 9am. I woke up FREEZING from leaving the air conditioning on all night...brrrr! But neverless, it was a great sleep. It was BEAUTIFUL from the time we woke up. We let Hobo sleep in the cabin. I just wanna take him home :( The thought of him being out there, is so sad :( Anyhow, so then Sunday we put together the new patio set and the Ikea bed for the bedroom. Both turned out so nicely! So that was that. It was a simply beautiful day out, unreal. I got totally burnt again (2nd weekend in a row, despite sunscreen!) But I am happy to report its a nice dark tan now :) We drove the quads for a while, Bandit swan a few times...the kids were out on Macks' quad the WHOLE time...Kennedy's quad has had a flat tire so we finally brought the tire back to Edm. to get it fixed. She will be so happy to finally have it again. But she did drive Macks quad a few times...we just turn down the speed on it for her. She loves it. They both take off and are gone for a while...they check in every round around the block. Its very safe out there, well as for cars and traffic not too much. They aren't allowed to do trails without us. Actually speaking of quads and safety, this Saturday is Jimmy's 1 year anniversary of his death from quadding while completetly drunk. He is our neighbor out there, and leaves his wife and young daugher (she is Kennedys age). There is a cross that marks the spot of his death. We were thinking of bringing him flowers at his cross. He was the self-proclaimed mayor of our close-knit resort...he was a great guy :(

Selfish or Unselfish...

What do you consider yourself to be?

I feel that I am a very unselfish person. I truely want the best for people in my life. There are never times that I am jealous of people for what they have, or wish that it was me. I am always thinking about other people first. I always worry about people when they are going through a hard time. I call, call, call my friends because I am thinking about them. I sometimes wish that I wasn't this way. Sometimes I wish that I wasn't me though. I don't seem to 'fit' with other people because I just care too much about things. And, sometimes its a burden. Fabe always tells me he loves me so much, because of the person who I am. People blow my mind when they meet me, and they later say how much they loved my personality. At work, parents will tell my boss or the staff that they chose our daycare because of me. I don't get it. Honestly, I don't. I know that I am a good person. But being good doesn't always pay off. I have changed so much in the past couple of years. As I get older, the more compassionate I become about people. I feel sad for people, who I don't even know when they talk about something that they are going through. I'm told that "your so quiet" yet, I don't see it. I truely care for my friends, I really really do...but feel that it gets me no where fast. Fabe thinks that maybe I need to meet new people and find a better fit for me, as we all change. But sometimes I don't have interest in that, and really can't be bothered. I don't know.

No point to this post, but I was just thinking about some things while I was washing my floors (lol) and it got me thinking. And, sometimes I think that it doesn't pay off being a good person. I mean, I don't know what I am expecting (if anything) but I just wonder about this. Usually you surround yourself with people who are likeminded but I can only count a few people who I feel really care for me back. I dunno. I guess that I am just saddened by the fact that there are so few people whom I can relate too. I mean, don't get me wrong. I have friends, friends who I know care and would do anything to help me out if needed...but I also have 'friends' who I feel are 'friends' with me for their own reasons...not necessarily because they care.

Anyhow.

Gotta go have a shower and get ready to go out!

Tara

Couldn't resist.

Today I bought 2 tickets to Big Valley. I could NOT-NOT go...I HAD to go and see Carrie Underwood. So, I did it. If anyone wants to come with us, they are general tickets (Nikki) so just buy 1 and you can come with us...we can drive out together :)

I can't wait!!!!

June- Tim McGraw & Faith Hill

August- Big Valley

Sept- Kieth Urban

Oct- Brad Pasiley (bought them yesturday!)

I can't waitttttt :)

Tara

Thanks "N" for the wedding card and gift :)

You know, some of our friends and family are just unreal. We got a bg stash of money from my daddy for our wedding and the MOST beautiful card from father to daughter, it was So sweet. My mom gave us a even bigger chunk (which we do not want from her yet, as we are going away for New Years on a trip with her money...) but anyhow. Today I got a nice gift card from my friend (went to school with her) and a beautiful 'congrats' card for our wedding. As well, cards from family and friends. So many people are so happy for us :) I never expect gifts (never) but cards are what I love...thank you for the friends who are reading this who have given us the many cards...we appreciate it and simply love them :) Thank you.

My dad's side of the family wants us to come up there for a summer BBQ for a mini-reception. My dad said that they will all give us cash up there...I hate that. I really do, I really don't expect anything...a card is just great. But they figure that a wedding is a wedding and something to celebrate. But anyhow, we will do that in July. Also, Fabe's family (who has come around) who live in Flordia will want to celebrate down there when we are there...

I love that so many are so happy for us.

Thank you all :)

Tara

What to do.

So the kids left with my mom to the lake. She took Bandit too. I am kidless, dogless and husbandless (he's working!). So, what to do. The house NEEDS to be tidied up. And I would rather do that today then tomorrow. Tomorrow I am planning to just lay out on the deck and catch some rays. My sun burn has finally turned into a tan so yeah. This weekend, I will probably get re-sunburnt again. I will be getting totally tanned this year if this weather keeps up. Not that its good for you.

So I might as well do a quick tidy. I was going to run to Good Will and buy some magazines and books from there to enjoy in the sun at the lake. But we will see. I have to be out to Sherwood Park by 7pm for my clothing club party. I hope to not stay out late tonight. Its going to be So weird to wake up to no kids and NO dog. Kinda sad.

Well, its 3:10pm so I will start my cleaning. I have to allow time to have a shower and get somewhat normal looking for the party tonight.

Later,

Tara

hot, hot. hot!!!

I'm loving it!!!!

Worked until 3pm today, it was a nice easy day. And hey, it was payday :) Gotta love that!!!! So I stopped at the bank, came home...got the kids, went to Dollarama then Sobeys for groceries. We got fresh fruite, raspberries, watermelon, strawberries, cherries and pineapple. Love fruit :)
Then we came home, I unloaded it all. Started laundry. Cooked supper (yes, I cooked it then my husband walked in and was just shocked!). Then I sat on the deck for a while with my new magazine. Okay, confession here. I am a magazine=a-holic. This is the SECOND time in the last little while that I have bought the SAME magazine...I know have 2 issues of it. Grrrr. I was getting good and buying a stack of them at Good Will so that I wouldn't have to waste so much money on them. Anyhow, I have a TON of magazines now so if anyone ever needs some reading material...let me know.

Tomorrow, I am working until noon. I will pick up the kids, and then my mom is picking the kids up from here and off to the lake they go. Then I have my clothing club party tomorrow night in Sherwood Park. Finally I can go. Then, Saturday I am SLEEPING in. I will either lay around on my deck or do some more yard work...then when Fabe gets off we will head to the lake for the night and Sunday-day.

Anyhow,

Tara

Tuesday

Today was a great day at work. I spent 2500.00 on stuff for the daycare today. Love that. I didnt get back to daycare until about 3pm. Left at 9:30am. So I stayed until 5:30 pm. Came home, Fabe had wonderful burgers made with all the dressings and trimmings. We had corn on the cob, fresh buns and potato salad. We ate out on the deck, the 4 of us and it was so nice. Then we hung out in the back yard for a while. Then a friend and her dog stopped by for a doggie playdate. We sat in the backyard talking for a while. Then, she left. And Fabe and my neighbor were outside talking so I chatted with them for a while too. 10pm came too fast and the kids needed showers so yeah, we got them in. Fabe is fast asleep on the couch and I am just on here, then going to bed. Wednesday already tomorrow. Yeah. Friday night my mom is taking the kids to the lake. I am going to my new clothing club party ( havent' been to my new group yet!) missed the other months! So maybe I will win :) Anyhow, I will sleep in Saturday. Then, Fabe and I will head out to the lake Sat for the night only and come back later Sunday (again!). The following weekend Kennedy has dance year end show. So thats good. I am sooooo super excited for Tim McGraw concert on the 19th of June :) Can't wait!!!!!! And, only 3 months until we leave for Disneyworld. Tonight, I paid for our Villa which we rented...I can't wait for that. A 4-bedroom house and our OWN swimming pool in the back yard. I can't wait!!!!!! Anyhow, I better go. I wanna get a drink and watch the news. I haven't watched it for a while now...

Tara

The lake!!!

Come and be my neighbor!!!! This lakefront lot is right next to ours :) Its for sale. But can I brag???? Its 159,000 and guess what? We didn't pay that for ours!!! And now we have 2 cabins and power so I think ours is worth about 200,000 which is simply AMAZING as we paid *only* 24,000 for ours 5 years ago!!! Pretty good deal :) :) :)
So pretty :) Who would think that a dandylion would be so pretty?

The living room of the cabin. We just put up sheets as we were waiting for the guy to mud and tape, but we aren't going to wait anymore. So our little living room. We bought sage green paint to paint it and have navy blue carpet that needs to be put down. We have the bamboo blinds but we won't worry about anything else until Sept when the guy isn't so busy. From the couch, we have a perfect view of the lake...its so peaceful and relaxing sitting out there watching the boaters and the sun setting. God country is right about the north...

Bandit and "Hobo" on our deck. Hobo is the community dog. We are so sure that he has a owner. He sleeps outside on our deck and waits for us in the mornings...we feel so bad for him. We feed him, give him treats, take him on our walks...he loves us. But the neighbors said he does have an owner but they can't keep him at home, he wanders. But I dunno. Anyhow, when we leave he goes to the year rounders...we don't mind him at all being there though. He's a very good dog, and LOVES to swim out and chase the birds.

The kids on the trampoline. Notice the shingles on the shed are all coming off and peeling...yeah thats from the kids jumping off the roof on to the trampoline.

Tanner and Bandit in the weeds of the lakefront.

Down at the lake/boat launch. The kids throwing stones into the lake. My little nephew...

The dogs going for a swim as well

Going back up the road, heading home...

So my mom came out with us. My sister and her husband were already there, my poor husband (still getting use to the word!!) had to work. He was going to call in sick to come out with us. But I would rather him come out when its just us. Anyhow, we left my house at 9:15 am stopped for breakfast at McD's. Headed out and stopped 2 times. Once at Grasslands for a pee, and then Plamondon for food at the Co-Op. We got to the lake nice and early. We were sad to see the guy didn't tape or mud at all. It was a mess in there. The stuff all piled up in the middle, ugh. So anyow we decided then and there, we are setting up the cabin and enough was enough. No more waitng for him. He told us by May long weekend. So forget it, we set it all up. And now its comfy. It was sooo nice having the couch there. We relaxed in the evening and watched a movie and the kids loved it.

We left Sunday fairly late, well later then what we had wanted to leave. We left about 4:30 got home about 7. It rained pretty much the whole time home. But it was nice. I didn't have to drive, normally I drive on the long highway trips as Fabe says "I drive all day, I don't feel like it" so then I do it. But my mom drove so it was super nice.

Playing on the stairs...

Bandit trying to get up the stairs...he wasn't liking it at all.

Macks crash landing...Kennedy giggling at him.

Mack coming back for more, Kennedy still laughing at him.

Kennedys turn, and Mack waiting to nicely to run up after she was done.

Kennedy JUMPING from there to the pillows

So safe, I know ;) The kids have been sleeping on the big couch cushions from the basement couch since last week. Well last the couch part went out to the lake for the cabin. And, the cushions didn't fit in the back of the truck and I didn't want to loose just one...so I kept them here. I got the kids to take them out of Mack's room and pile them by the door so they would be ready to go out to the lake...this weekend. So OF COURSE, they had to find another way to get them down the stairs....they played on the stairs for a good hour. Sliding down on them, putting them all the way up the stairs and trying to 'rock climb' up the stairs. They are so funny, but I have to say...I absolutely LOVE it when they get along so well together, it warms my heart :)

Great week.

This was a great week. I feel so much better. Last week, I was honestly going to call it quits. Anyhow, this week was pretty good :)

Anyhow, it was a nice short work week. Love that. Didn't really do much. Last night I worked until 6pm to make me seen to the parents. And Fabe cleaned the garage perfectly. Other then that, we haven't done much.

Today is Friday. We were going to head to the lake tonight but decided to go out tomorrow morning instead. So, we are going to do that. Just the kids, the dog and I. Fabe has to work. Too bad for him ;) My sister and her hubby are there at their cabin so we thought we will go out there too.

Tonight, I am just getting our clothing ready for the day. The kids and I are doing a 'power hour' which is we ALL clean together for one hour to get it all done fast. They love this, as they don't think that an hour is that bad. So we got done the main floor. The floors are just drying. The kids are working on their rooms, and we just came up here to finish it off. Thankfully, there isn't much laundry to do or anything major. A quick cleaning and mopping and its pretty good. I can't bear the thought of coming home to a messy house...as Fabe will be working all weekend and won't be home too much.

Anyhow, I better go finish...

Tara :)

Sister in town pics.

Kennedy on her scooter.

My nephews, Braeden and Matthew. They so cute, too bad you can't see their faces!

Mack...

Checking out my moms tattoo.

My mom (in the green shirt), sister in track suit and my nephew in the red shirt. they are checking out my moms tattoo.

All the kids, hanging out.

These pics are from when my sister was in town.

Dog park :)

The bridge that went under from all of the water...

bandit taking a swim.

So pretty...

Bandit checking it out.

Yes!!!!

So our dr. for Kennedy FINALLY signed the disability tax credit form and he said that they will go back to birth :) :) :) :) It works out to 2500.00 more this year on our return. We just did out taxes last night, and we will be getting back a decent chunk. I am so happy!!!!!!!! I can't WAIT for that check...its going to be pretty fat!!!!

:) :) :)

I will buy a truck load of Boost and store it in the shed and Kennedy can drink her little heart away when ever she wants it....no more 'only 2 a day!'

YEAH!!!!

Monday holiday!

Monday was good. Fabe was off this weekend, which made it even better :) We got LOTS of time in together.It was super nice.

Our day began with Fabe making everyone Omlettes for breakfast. Yummy :) Then we got ready and headed out for a day of driving. We went to Antler Lake and checked it out there. We let the kids play at the park there for a while. Fabe and I sat on the swings, just chatting about everything and everyone. Then, we drove around for an hour no place in particular just drove around.

Then, we went to my moms house. She ordered us chineese food. It was so good. Fabe did some stuff around her house which was taking a while, so my mom drove the kids and I home. We got home late, Fabe stayed down there with my mom. I gave the kids a shower and Kennedy did her treatments and stuff. They got to bed very late, at 10:30 Pm!

Today we woke up, the sun was waiting to burst through the blinds in the livingroom. I love opening them and letting it burst through. It was so nice...I stand there for a moment just absorbing the sun. I love the sun.

Today, its a nice day. Work so far is pretty smooth, thankfully. All the kids and staff are heading out to the park so it will be just me to enjoy the peacefulness of the centre.

I work until 4pm, then I will do some work in the yard again. I still have various bedding plants to put in the ground. Other then that, no plans. We washed the bedding on the weekend. Last night, I put pictures in the photo albums and got up to date with those. Feels like I am getting somewhat organized.

Well I better go.

Tara

Sunday over

Well its 9pm and we just got home. The kids have the dog for a quick run around the block and we are going to get ready for Desperate Housewives. It was a nice day. We met my mom at 1pm at the dealership and my uncle was with her. Well, not only did she buy her car he ended up buying a brand new car too :) Lucky sales guy! Then, we went to Ikea...bought some crap. Then my mom and uncle wanted to meet us for supper but they were going to WalMArt so knowing that we were going to meet up at Rosies we took the kids to Lakewood Park to kill some time. Well, what a shock. We pulled into the parking lot, and there was a litte (little) boy leaving the park alone. I was like "oh no, I hope his mom sees him leaving" and then nothing. He went right to the road, trying to cross it. Its not a main road, but it IS a busy road. So anyhow, Fabe was like 'call the cops!" as we watched him for like 10 mins. So we called, and he told me to go and talk to him. I got out, tried to talk to him, get his name and what not. Nothing. He didn't even talk, he was THAT young. Fabe and I guessed 3 at the very oldest but up close, I knew he was not near 3 years old!!!! So anyhow, on the phone with the cops for like 15 mins....waiting waiting. Then, this girl comes around calling him "Mason, Mason GET OVER HERE NOW!" So I said "is this your brother?" She goes "yah" I said "how old is he?" she said "I dont' know!" so I tried to talk to her, telling her how unsafe it was for him, etc, etc,etc. Then the cop said tell her I want to talk to her and find out whats going on and where mom is. So she refused to talk. I said "its the Edmonton City Police, you need to talk them" and she said "I don't have to do anything" kicking her dog to "move" so anyhow. The cop on the phone told me to stay there, a car was only 5 mins away. Then, across the SAME street from the SAME housing complex a little tiny boy comes running to the park, goes to the same 13 year old girl...so I walk to the park, keeping my distance from her but just ensuring she doesn't leave. Well, here she has guinea pigs, a dog that she mistreats, 4 children and a whole load of crap to haul around. The cops come, talk to her. The last little kid gets taken home, he's almost 2 another person said who knows him...yet he is ALONE at the park...across a street. We aren't talking in the same complex, is a park (which would still be bad!) but across a street...So the cop packs them ALL up and walks to the housing complex...we get outta there....but we were all in utter shock. I could have SOOOO easily taken that little boy...for 20 mins I stood with him...no one knew where he was. No one. Ugh. And so many people can't have children yet there are sooooo many children who just exist in thier parents eyes. Its so sad. Really, its sad.

Anyhow, we are home. And going to relax now.

TTYL!

Tara

Sunday.

I love that tomorrow there is still no work. I hate this feeling of not enjoying my job anymore. And taking time off, is not an option as we are SO close to our deadline and from here on in, requires MAJOR work. Anyhow, Its Sunday. The sun is finally out.

Yesturday Fabe and I sorted all of our tax stuff, we still haven't filed as we had to total up all of his receipts for work (gas, meals, etc) so we did all that. We are going to have a BIG HUGE chunk of write offs :) Yeah!!!!!

Then, we began to head to my moms house, in my moms car. She can't take her car (a very beautiful brand new convertiable) out to the lake as its a gravol road for about 10 mins. When it rains out there, the road is horrible. So she ALWAYS takes one of our cars. She took the truck...as she drove our couch out there. Anyhow, she wants to get a vechicle more practical for her. So, she has been looking with Fabe. Anyhow, on the way downtown I asked her if she wanted us to stop and see about a van. She LOVES vans. So, she wanted us too. So we did, and we did up a deal and everything...they gave us a really good price for her car and yeah, just a really good feeling. Fabe is a DEAL maker..and he made a good one. SO, we went to her house she fed us supper...and she said 'yeah' so today at 1pm we are going there, she just has to sign and its all done. Tuesday she will get her brand new van out of the showroom, DVD player, full loaded..its so pretty. NOW, I am not missing my van anymore :) :) :) I have a van that I can use at any time!!!! And she will be SO happy to have a car that she can go places with. And, since she always goes places with my kids, the DVD player is really an added bonus. She will be so happy.

Then, we came home. Put the kids to bed, had popcorn in bed together and watched a show. I had a really bad dream. It stems from missing Kennedys treatment last night before bed. Ugh. I was worried about missing it, but she isn't sick so I can ease up...but anyhow. In my dream, someone reported me to Child Welfare for not meeting her needs, medically and she got taken away and ugh, it was HORRIBLE. Anyhow.

We slept in until 9am today. Felt sooo good. Fabe ran to Sobeys and bought breakfast stuff so we had a wonderful breakfast. The kids and him (Fabe) are outside right now doing stuff in the garage. I am going to pop into the shower, and get ready as we have to meet my mom at the dealership at 1pm. Then, I told Fabe that either we should take a drive out to Antler Lake (I really wanna show him out there!) or we should take the kids to the BMX track, mack is dying to go there. So yeah.

Tonight, I want to rent a movie on PPV with the kids. I love long weekends...especially when I feel like this!

We are hoping that the guy can finish the taping and the mudding in the cabin this week. If he does, then the kids and I are going out there next weekend. Fabe works, but I really really wanna get a head start and paint and get it all ready for decorating and getting it comfy. Everything is a mess right now, things are everywhere. Ugh. My sister said that she is more then likely going to go out too, so hopefully its nice out. Fabe will be lost without us here...

Anyhow, I better have a shower. I need lots of time to get beautiful ;)

Tara